Thats it Keep the Facade Up Just a Tad Bit Longer…

November 5, 2007




“Sometimes… you have to ask yourself “Is it worth it?”. Is medicine worth all the studying, time, breath, “torture”, and the killing of your morality and standards…. Well, that question my friend, only you can answer for yourself…”- J.R.

We tend to kid ourselves, and deceive our conscious… We live in a world where everyone’s opinions weigh heavy on our actions, even if we don’t say they do… So why is it that IF we care about others thoughts, we automatically think were somewhat “insecure”? Hmm…maybe were living a lie, and were afraid others will discover and exploit our hidden secrets if we don’t “play” along with them… We tend to “chime” in and perfectly act the role out, so that no one ever discovers who we truly are, and what our ideals portray… So why is it that we have a desire to “fit in”? Why is it we want to be accepted, and be part of the crowd? Do we feel a sense of warmness that comes along with being accepted? Do we feel as though were less than “perfect” if we face rejection? Were all searching for these answers, and I might of found mines…

I believe the reason were so wound up on trying to be a part of something outside of our “norm”, a part of something so ambiguous; has to be because were afraid of being alone, were afraid of being rejected, and were afraid of living without a sense of security that ironically an insecure group of people within this insecure world “can” provide. Being true to yourself isn’t just about being truthful, and never deceiving yourself… It’s about being true to others as well… But of course, we find this hard to incorporate, because we tend to give up after we’ve faltered several times within this area. We ineluctably ask ourselves these questions: “What will others think?”, “Will I pay the price of loosing my friends?”, “Will I be cast aside and sentenced to an eternity alone?”…. I’m no saint, nor am I one to rightfully judge anyone. But I am one that can clearly see how our society stammers… Ask yourself, if you believe your friends, family and acquaintances would run away, if you were to tell them your hidden secrets… And if the answer’s yes, well nine times out of ten your going to have to bottle everything up, while you end up feeling resentment towards them, because you know it wouldn’t matter how hard you try or wish to make them understand, it may never happen. With this being said, analyze your life as I’ve analyzed mine… Then “dispose” of what’s holding you back from your true self… Its easier said than done, but easier done than kept imprisoned by your own conscious… Take it from someone who knows…


2 Responses to “Thats it Keep the Facade Up Just a Tad Bit Longer…”

  1. Shane Says:

    “Take it from someone who knows”

    Where has this revelation lead you? Care to share?

  2. Inevitable Sleep Says:

    Yes I would.. In the past I had a lot of things or “secrets” that I knew were horrible. I knew that if I would tell some of my friends and family members they would well lets just say.. runaway from me.. I never realized that constantly being surrounded by people who I couldn’t talk to could be hurtful.. It’s okay to hang out with people you aren’t too close with, but at times just know that even if you don’t think you do, we all need someone to talk to, someone we truly trust to tell whats on our mine, the things that have caused us to stumble and how we feel.. If you have NO ONE that you can talk to about ANY of this.. Then the world could be a cold place. For a long time I lived in this “cold world”. I kept everything bottled up and NEVER let it out.. I longed to talk to someone about my struggles, emotions, and troubles, but when I looked around… no one was there. You can ask yourself “Well how do I find someone to that I can talk to, and share my deepest sentiments”, and I’ll tell you that its not easy buts its possible. Mainly because not everyone that says “I’ll always be here for you, no matter what” means it… The “no matter what” is limited to a certain amount of things… Or precisely, things that won’t completely distort that persons view of “who we are”… And if you dwell on that too much, then thats when you’ll start adapting to your environment… Meaning that you’ll belittle your true self just so you can accommodates others view of you. But if you tell yourself that you WON’T accommodate others and you won’t live your life according to others “judgments” then you’ll start self reflecting and realizing how you need to shift your priorities and let secrets that hold you back go… It isn’t an “overnight” automatic change, but it can happen… I apologize I’m writing at a fast pace, because I have to do something… Your all welcome to your personal views and insights… I hope you can sort of understand what I’m trying depict…

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